Little bro’ Bergen


Confidence naturally surpasses insight in Bergens Tidende, in traditonal bergensian bragging manner. Obviously Stavanger far superior to this fishing village north of the Bømlo island.
This week, we cemented that Stavanger is the capital of the west coast. We not only got another Michelin star but also the renewable fund. These are facts that Bergenians have a hard time to face.
Now some Steinfeldt-Bergensians from this small fishing village just south of Førde believe that they are worth a shit just because they have a rusty tram-line running up a slope, a large bus-stop at the town centre and a football team that miraculously has retained a place in the league once again.

Anyways , Bergen is as everyone knows composed of 70 percent sound and for the rest air, but when little brother picks up the glove and alleges that Bergen leads 10-0 over Stavanger, it is time that adults interferes with some sense.

Bergen has Kygo, something BT has considered as a PLUS ?. Journalists and numbers, clearly a musical deduction. 1-0 to Stavanger.

Bergen was at one time degraded from being the capital of Norway. That shame we newer experienced in Stavanger (and even though we like Oslo even less than Bergen, we take the points we can get them!). 2-0 to Stavanger.

When we are dvelving into history: In 1349 was Bergen’s healthcare system was as poor as the city’s restaurant industry is today. Bergen virtually invited the Black Death into the country. Stavanger on the other hand has never spread any plague that killed half the country’s population. 3-0 to Stavanger.

Bergen had a slightly musty inside reporter Hans-Wilhelm Steinfeld in Moscow, with no need of a microphone, strictly speaking, but seriously; Let’s not forget: Odd Karsten aka “Ramallah” Tveit! 4-0 to Stavanger.

Bergen has their brigades (buekorps). In Stavanger we have talented kids that wield multiple Instruments, including the Tuba and Trombone. 5-0 to Stavanger.

Bergen has Trude Drevland. 6-0 to Stavanger.

Bergen has John Olav Nilsen. Fair enough, but Stavanger and Viking has Olav Nilsen. And don’t mention the overrated Knoksen or Knaksen or whatever his name is in the same breath with his non-existing heading power. Facts is a killer to all good discussions, but check the marathon table. 7-0 to Stavanger.

Stavanger has oil. Bergen has, at best, fish oil and some bad fish sold at the dock. 8-0 to Stavanger.

Did we mention this Drevland? 9-0 to Stavanger.

In 1985 Stavangers performers virtually saved Africa on their own.

Meanwhile the musicians from this small hamlet south of Knarvik claimed that the Americans used a melody of their making. Basically Kygo of 1985. 10-0 to Stavanger.

A little less than an hour away from Stavanger you can experience the pulpit rock, recommended by Lonely Planet. A little less than a hour away from Bergen you can experience Vossafår, “recommended by a blind bride.” 11-0 to Stavanger.

Bergen offers weather that make a deluge to seem to likee a drizzle. In Stavanger we had sunny weather for FOUR DAYS IN A ROW in 2016. 12-0 to Stavanger.

The voice of the handball keeper, Ceclie Leganger in a happy mood, better known as “Nystemten”? 13-0 to Stavanger.

Stavanger Oilers. Bergen well, Bergen has … has … ups! 14-0 to Stavanger.

Have we mentioned Drevland? We may have it, but this town a little east of Sotra employed the coffee maker Herman Friele as mayor before the cruise controller Drevland took over. Stavanger has solely had humble mayors, such as Arne Rettedal. 15-0 to Stavanger.

We have Old Town. Bergen has this pier they are so proud of. The mentioned quay is about to sink into the sea. The Bergen solution? Adding new train sets over the quay. they will make a special stop right outside the offices of renewable …. oh no … a separate stop outside the restaurant with Miche …. oh no.
16-0 to Stavanger.

Case closed.


Source:   Stavanger Aftenblad  / Norway Today